pwn3d

I beat a guy on MLB 2K5 today, 9-0, Giants v. Dodgers...and I got a no-hitter/perfect game against him...save for an error by Omar Vizquel in the 7th on a grounder hit by Jeff Kent. I proceeded to retire him on a double play, and ended up giving up no hits, no walks, and faced the minimum 27 batters, but it's only a no-hitter, not a perfect game, according to the minds at the IGN Baseball board. That's a shame, as the game seemed to think that it was a perfect game, not a no-hitter. Oh well. I still pwn3d him well (thanks to some great catches by Moises Alou and Joe Young, aka Barry "BALCO" Bonds)

Does Nintendo want me to buy a damn PSP, or what?

New Game Boy this year? (CNN)

Apparently Nintendo might just be releasing the new GB before the end of the year.

I'm sorry, Nintendo. I bought the GBA, GBASP, and the DS. In a period of 3 and a half years. I'm not going to buy a 4th system a year after another one comes out. I'm sorry. I'll buy a system that the creator is going to support for a long time - the PSP.

Of course, it's based on "analyst's opinions," and those are usually bullshit. So I guess I'm not TOO worried.

So MLB 2K5 came out today...

...completely unexpectedly. Apparently Take-Two decided that it would ship out its copies that were already made just yesterday, to coincide with the release date of MVP Baseball, which shipped yesterday as well.

Sadly, the rosters were made back in like, fucking December, and there's no official roster update yet. Bleh. I hate making all the moves myself anyway, because it's just too damn time-consuming.

The game? Yeah, it's cool so far, but it takes a while to really realize how good of a game it is, by playing lots of them to find out how realistic the game is.

Linux on Xbox

...is really, quite brilliant. I helped install it on my friend Adam's Xbox, and it's something I would love to do if I didn't have to sacrifice Xbox Live functionality. The dashboard programs that run on it let you do cool stuff - you can run emulators (we installed an SNES and N64 emulator - Super Punch-Out!! is truly awesome. The N64 games can be a bit glitchy, though), run homebrew games (mostly crap), listen to music and watch videos (with the Xbox Media Player Center, or something like that, you can watch video files and also DVDs, without need of the $30 DVD kit), and even backup games to the harddrive (you'd probably need to install a bigger harddrive for full functionality - most games are too big for even the normal Xbox harddrive, but KotOR fit on Adam's HD, but it took most of it up, like 90% of it), and run them off of there. Shweet.

Selling my GameCube and games just for another Xbox never sounded so good. I'd love to have one to install Linux on there - although the Xbox Media Player Center supports the X-Link Kai LAN tunnelling service, so it's really not THAT big of a sacrifice. And it's free. Shweet.

If you want to know how to install it, I'd have to show you a few links - you need to get on IRC, to get the really cool stuff, though. And you need the Xbox USB adapter to even get started.

New Elder Scrolls: Oblivion screens

OMGWTFLMAOBBQ

Other pics here:
http://www.elderscrolls.com/images/art/obliv/obliv16B.jpg (full-size of above)
http://www.elderscrolls.com/images/art/obliv/obliv17B.jpg
http://www.elderscrolls.com/images/art/obliv/obliv18B.jpg

Holy shit. The next gen is going to be crazy...DAWG.

Uwe Blog

http://www.livejournal.com/users/uwe_boll/

Needs no explanation.

Virtua Quest = pwned...err, not pwned, really

January NPD Numbers:

Virtua Quest (GC) - 321
Virtua Quest (PS2) - 258

Those are HUNDREDS. Holy fucking shit. I'm almost tempted to buy a copy, because it'll be incredibly rare some day...or not.

My God, What Have You Become, Sega?

Various Thoughts.

• Zoo Keeper is pretty fun, but it's a good thing that it only cost me $30. And did anyone realize that the guy on the box looks like Hitler before they made the box?
• Green Day's American Idiot album is pretty cool, but some of the songs blend together and sound the same. It's still pretty cool.
• March 1st is when The Mars Volta's Frances The Mute comes out. De-Loused in the Comatorium is a masterpiece of the "On Crack" genre of music - can their next album repeat the success at being completely incomprehensible on the surface?
• I can buy 3 plastic replacement DS stylii for $8-$10 from Nintendo...or just buy Pelican's stainless steel stylii that are heavier (which just feels better), are a tighter fit (these suckers will not come out of the stylus slot, EVAR), and match the top of the system better. And I did that.
• I never knew Uwe Boll went by the pseudonym Larry Guterman. But I mean, a 0% on Rotten Tomatoes? That's like a fucking record or something.
• I walk alone, I walk alone...
• This guy is a crazy artist. Jose Lima's wife's breasts are dramatically smaller in this comic than they are in real life, though. But Milton Bradley going crazy in every frame is awesome, though
• My God, who the hell made it so damn hard to find retractable earbuds?
• 4-day weekends are teh pwn. Much Halo 2, Unreal Championship 2, and whatever the hell else I feel like shall be played over teh intarnet.
• Will the world explode or implode if Keanu Reeves ever wins an Oscar? And will the first word he says be "Whoa?"
  

...but not any longer

It was supposed to be a secret. I wanted you to remain discreet and subtle about it. Instead, you go blabbing off about it to one of the least discreet people on the planet. The security of myself and this site have been compromised because of it. So I've decided to eliminate the problem. Only those I trust will get the goodies. And nowadays, that's a short list.

So thank the one who is at fault for this. You know who he is, and you should give him the gift of death. Revengeful death, even.

A good opportunity wasted

The Matrix: Path of Neo. Instead of a Matrix game that follows-up on and expands the series' storyline, there's a cheap cop-out with just making a game based on the trilogy. I mean, I'm sure it'll be decent, and have it's cool moments, but...I just think it would be cooler if it was based on new material.

It might be worth it just to do the Burly Brawl. That would be sweet.

(And on another note, Unreal Championship 2 > Halo 2. 'nuff said.)

It's kind of sad when...

...you consider only buying 5 games in a 2 month span is limiting your purchases.

Wario Ware: Touched! (2/15)
MLB 2K5 (3/1)
MVP Baseball 2005 (3/1)
Wario Ware: Twisted! (Sometime in March)
Unreal Championship 2 (April 11th)

And I'm considering importing Donkey Kong: King of Swing from Europe. God, am I sad. Oh well. Want to buy some games?

You heard it here first!

Unreal Championship 2 will be the Game of the Year. Yes, it is THAT DAMN good...and the full version isn't even out yet!

It is also the best video game representation of The Matrix seen yet. You can do some crazy shit in this game - and the secrets seem limitless. I'm wetting my pants in anticipation.

If you have Xbox Live, go either get the new OXM, or preorder the game to get the demo. IT IS FUCKING INCREDIBLE. End of story.

I mean, holy frickin' crap!

Unreal Championship 2 is really fucking insane. There's a lot of button mashing, but damn, this game is wrapped in bacon, going 130 through a hospital zone, and the ambulance is on fire, and is being chased by ninjas, who are also on fire. This game is fucking FAST. And crazy. And pretty much impossible to make sense of. There's a lot of high speed randomness going on, and you won't even really know what's going on. It makes Halo 2 (a fast game itself) look like it's running through molasses. Damn. Can't wait till April, for more maps, and 8 player action (4 players only currently)...

The best petition...EVAR

The Stop Ashlee Simpson Petition

I mean, she's hot, but also a moron and even fucking worse singer. This petition is for the good of mankind.

300k+ people can't be wrong, can they? :0)

Somebody call the suicide hotline...

Word has it that the Unreal Championship 2 demo doesn't support "HD", according to some asshole on IGN. I mean, it better fucking be only for the demo, or he was referring to 720p/1080i, because if it doesn't support 480p (like every other Xbox game worth a shit), which means it won't run on my monitor using the VD-Z3 Component->VGA Transcoder, which means that the game I've waited for since it was announced, I couldn't play. My life would have no more meaning - this has been what I've looked forward to most this year. And not being able to play this game would make me cry profusely. So someone better hope that that fucking asstwat wasn't referring to "HD" meaning 720p and 1080i, not 480p, or there will be death, including possibly my own. :(

UPDATE, 11:36 PM: Apparently the back of the case the demo's in says that it supports 480p. So you may resume your plots against me. The clouds will be happy to hear this.

"Tomorrow, we strike. And I really mean it this time."

Metroid Pinball DS

http://www.ebgames.com/ebx/product/255933.asp

I mean, this could be cool if it's done right. But...I don't know. I'm kinda scared.

Well, God damn it

Now MLB 2K5 and MVP 2005 are coming out on the same fucking day. Do they want my head to explode or what? I mean, trying to figure out and keep seperate two different pitching, hitting, and fielding systems is going to be a living hell. At least it's a living hell that I'll only have to pay $50 total for on March 1st. So I guess I can live with that...DAWG.

Why pay $2.4 million when you can get it for free?

Well, with the fuss over GoDaddy.com's second running of their Super Bowl ad (OMG, her strap came off! MEGATON!), a windfall has come from the free publicity they're getting on news shows and PTI, where I'm surprised that the "Safin's Babe" toss-up wasn't Marat Safin's girlfriend vs. the GoDaddy.com girl (Those sleuths on the internets have deduced that it might be her, but the commercial made her boobs look alot bigger... http://www.candicemichelle.com/). Hell, even I don't know who wins that one. Although Marat Safin's girlfriend is wicked hot. That's a toughie.

But to get back on track, GoDaddy.com is at a free publicity high. There was ALREADY controversy over the slightly 'racy' ad, which is a send-up of the whole Janet Jackson 'Nipplegate' fiasco (was I the only one who was just a little nervous when Paul McCartney took off his jacket? Heh heh...ugh.), and NOW you have the controversy over having the 2nd airing being pulled. Which is helping to get the GoDaddy.com name out more and more.

Some people are having wet dreams over all the free publicity they're getting. And hey, it's a good service...I'd certainly use it (here's to the financial backing being there for uwebollmustdie.com...).

Uwe Boll Must Die?

Well, I got a crazy idea. Using a $9 domain name from GoDaddy.com, and $1/month hosting from gametied.com, I register uwebollmustdie.com. It'll get the point across, I'll achieve internet infamy, and I'll get a nice convenient file hosting service for whenever I need to host a file or such. It's pretty neato.

Should I? Well, if I can get a friend or two to split the pot with me, then fo' sho'. Keep reading here to keep abreast on the latest details.

The Super Yawn

Has there ever been a less exciting Super Bowl that was this close? I mean, it was tied going into the 4th quarter, and my God, it had little to no excitement whatsoever. It was an interesting game, but if it weren't the Super Bowl, I'd probably change the channel.

None of the ads were really that spectacular. Now, my ad awards

Worst Commercial, actual content: Pepsi's second iTunes giveaway commercial. Which was nearly identical to the first, except with some annoying Gwen Stefani song playing throughout. (By the way, I've read that Gwen Stefani had breast implants recently. Isn't it hard to have breast implants when you have no breasts in the first place?)
Worst Commercial, "We get the fucking point already": Ford Mustang commercial with the frozen guy in it. This ad aired like 5 times. Someone needs to tell the car companies how to make actual good commercials, and how to properly advertize them. Like not 5 times in the same Super Bowl.
Best Commercial, hot chick category, drama: Tabasco commercial. That was hot. No pun intended.
Best Commercial, hot chick category, comedy or musical: GoDaddy.com. Go Daddy Go Daddy Go Daddy Go!
Best Commercial Sequel: NFL Network, "Tomorrow": Same concept as similar ad that aired year before, but still effectively funny. And hey, it had Ben Roethlisberger and Joe Montana doing backflips. The only thing it didn't have was Peyton Manning, aka Javier Lopez.
Best Commercial, Overall Excellence: FedEx Kinko's, "10 Cliches" - A dancing, talking bear giving Burt Reynolds a kick in the family jewels to Burt Reynolds? Brilliant!


Also, The Simpsons was funny (especially the Mario and Pac-Man sequences), and American Dad...well, let's just say I'm glad they have until May to fix that one up. A tad bit disappointing. Or maybe it's just because we have the connotation to Family Guy. I don't know, I wasn't a huge fan.

It's a good time to be a baseball gamer.

EB Games has MLB 2k5 listed as $20.

Now there's rumblings on IGN that EA will price MVP Baseball 2005 at $30.

I think my feelings on the matter can be summed up simply as this - :)

Guy falls asleep in Halo 2, hilarity ensues

http://www.putfile.com/media.php?n=scut

This is piss-your-pants funny. I mean, this is fucking hilarious. Comedy gold.

Just make sure you watch it with the sound on - that's what makes it great.

Help Protect Against Prostate Cancer!

http://www.newscientist.com/article.ns?id=dn4861

9 months old, but basically, if you never got the memo, here's the good news:

Frequent sexual intercourse and masturbation protects men against a common form of cancer, suggests the largest study of the issue to date yet.

The US study, which followed nearly 30,000 men over eight years, showed that those that ejaculated most frequently were significantly less likely to get prostate cancer. The results back the findings of a smaller Australian study revealed by New Scientist in July 2003 that asserted that masturbation was good for men.

Feel free to celebrate as you choose. Just don't let us see it, OK? Besides, if you do, you might end up like this guy. Damn Canadians.

BloodRayne trailer...

As an update to my post from the other day, the trailer to the latest videogame movie from this generation's finest director of high-quality cinema, Uwe Boll, BloodRayne, has been released.

http://media.cinema-post.de/BRay_TTeas.mpg

'. . .'
DOT DOT DOT.

How the fuck does this man get any work? It boggles my mind. And was Kristanna Loken really THAT desperate for work after Terminator 3 came out?

Toilet Boll comes through again!